August 2017

Be a Ripple

Melissa Brunell

Be a ripple!

In today’s current world, I have to seriously wonder about the state of people’s hearts. It doesn’t seem like there are many happy ones lately. It is so easy to get caught up in the “go, go, go” of life and get sucked into the nastiness that so many are spreading. That’s exactly what Satan wants. The title of my blog page is Be Happy with Melissa. This is a lifestyle blog so I mainly talk about my life….big shocker! Haha!

I didn’t choose that name on accident and I didn’t choose it because I am always happy. I’m a work in progress. I chose it because ‘’be happy” has been a mantra of mine since I was in high school. I remember writing it on notebooks in class and making a sign for the inside of my locker. It has stayed with me over the years and I even remember writing it down on a sticky note when I had a desk job. It’s a reminder for myself to look for the good. Hence my tag line of, “Finding JOY in everyday life”. I didn’t pick those lines because I’m good at them.  I picked them because I need the reminder for MYSELF.

Social media seems to play a big roll in how people feel. Social media is everywhere, so I guess it makes sense. During this past election, I had to unfollow or hide so many pages and posts that people made. I didn’t unfriend anyone, I just hid posts that some made that were hateful. Every time I got onto social media, my heart would race from people just being mean. I don’t really care what “side” you stand on politically. I’m sure you have your reasons for your “side”. But I was shocked at all the name calling and plain old hatred towards one another. I just wanted the election to be over so people would start acting a little bit more normal.

Many people in the world today are just so angry all the time and it feels like some of those people just want to puke that hatred all over everyone else. Whether it be a political post or any other number of hot button topics. I couldn’t stand it. It literally hurt my heart. It would make me feel sick. Maybe I should’ve said something but that probably would’ve just fueled the fire.

I needed the break from the mean and the ick so I started to follow more “feel good” pages on social media. I still need to unfollow or hide a post every now and again but it’s a lot better than it was. I really enjoy feel good stories. Why??? Because it makes ME feel good. When I feel good, it’s easier to spread the happiness.

BE A RIPPLE!! If more people did a random act of kindness, that little ripple could grow to become huge waves of happiness! I was reminded of this tonight. I was scrolling through my social media pages and one popped up from my towns page. Someone bought the County Sheriff his tacos tonight and that caused a chain reaction of good and positivity. One act of kindness. One person. Not many people. ONE. How many people were impacted? I’m not sure, as the post did not say. But I do know that those people had a good and positive reaction. I know from the comments that it impacted someone deeply. If those people feel better, they might somehow keep the ripple going by doing something nice for someone else.

I’m not saying you must buy food for someone at a fast food place. I’m not saying you need to buy anything at all. A few weeks ago, someone on our towns page mentioned that they saw some workers outside in our extreme heat wave. They took them some lemonade. It made their day! They couldn’t believe how such a small act caused so much joy for the recipient.  Another day, someone took a police officer a cold bottle of water while he was out patrolling. Made him feel appreciated.

Even just smiling and waving at someone can dramatically change someone’s mood. Try it!! I bet it makes you feel better, too. The next time you are a retail store, even if the cashier isn’t the friendliest, be nice and smile. I’m sure they’ve had a long day of cranky customers. I worked retail for many years. I’m telling you, when you get a bunch of cranky customers in a row, it can really mess with you. A customer showing compassion, smiling, and being nice can be the jolt that is needed to shake off those past customers and get that smile back on their face.  Make it your mission to make every cashier that you come in contact with smile. And if you are scrolling on social media and you see something controversial…..don’t click on it. Just don’t do it. Keep scrolling and say, “NOT TODAY SATAN!!!!”

Be a ripple. Spread the happiness. Find JOY in everyday life.

Meeting Jesus

Melissa Brunell

Death…
It’s like a 4-letter word, only with 5 letters.

When a death happens in the family (or to a close friend’s family), it’s always amazing to me how the whole world doesn’t stand still with us. It seems like the affected family’s world turns at an incredibly slow pace. Everyone else continues to hustle and bustle about their day without a care. Don’t they know what just happened to our family?? How DARE they act as if nothing has happened!!!

I remember feeling this way with every loss (and almost loss) my family has experienced. I had the incredible experience of witnessing my Maternal Grandmother passing away. There was most definitely a higher power in that hospital room that both my Grandma and my young daughter saw. I was also in the room when my Paternal Grandmother passed away. Watching someone pass from this life to the next is a very unique experience. Those are stories for another day, I suppose.

As I am getting older, I’m noticing the number of people that I have lost keeps getting bigger. It makes sense, really. As I get older, I know more people. Additionally, those people that I knew as a little girl are getting older too. It’s unnerving, if I’m being honest. It really reminds you that you will not be here forever.

Matt’s Uncle passed away very unexpectedly last month. My family, both blood and in-law, are located all over the United States. Coast to coast, I believe. We don’t always have the time or the means to see everyone when everyone is so spread out. Even though it had been several years since Matt had seen his Uncle, the news hit him hard.

We don’t always see one another or talk or text, but we do take comfort in the fact that people are here among the living just doing their day to day thing. When a family member dies, there is a hole left . No matter how close or distant, there is always a hole.

Picture of my in-laws, Aunt Barbara and Uncle Bill. My Dad is an artist and painted this background for us. We had every guest take their picture by it. I’m so glad we did.

When you lose someone, it makes you reminiscence about all the fun times (and maybe the not so fun times) you’ve had with that person. I, personally, only met Uncle Bill one time. That was on my wedding day. He was one of the groomsmen.

Uncle Bill capturing a moment.

Matt and I had a very small, outdoor wedding. Since it was my wedding day, I was more preoccupied with wedding details than getting to know my new husbands extended family. I regret that I did not get the chance to know him better. To be fair, however, how well can you get to know someone in just a few hours??

When Matt got the phone call about his Uncle, I immediately thought of one specific picture. (Picture is below.)  If you know me at all, you know that I LOVE pictures! I grew up loving to look at picture albums that my Dad put together. Even now that my Sister and I are grown, we still enjoy pulling out those old photo albums and reliving the moments.

At our wedding, we had lots of people taking pictures and we even left disposable cameras on tables for our guests to help capture fun moments. After 10 years, I do not remember if the below picture was captured on a disposable camera or not, but someone was able to capture the fun and lightheartedness of the day.

This captures them perfectly. Uncle-In-Law Bill and Father-In-Law.

One might think that these two men were brothers. They were, in fact, brothers-in-law. Their wives are sisters. They both served in the Army overseas in Germany at the same time. My Mother-In-Law and her Sister (and her kids) were also able to be in Germany with the guys.  Matt was born overseas in Germany, too.  Since they were family, and were in a foreign country, they spent a lot of time together and have a special bond that only they share from this experience. I enjoy listening to stories of their years in Germany before they came back home.

Matt and I with some of Matt’s extended family.

As a Christian family, we can take some comfort in knowing that we will see Uncle Bill again. It is still INCREDIBLY difficult knowing that we won’t see him again on this side of Heaven. Being a Christian doesn’t make the grief any less. He was a Husband, a Dad, a Grandpa, a Brother, an Uncle, and a Friend.

Bridesmaid Kris and Groomsman Uncle Bill after the ceremony. Fun fact: That’s my Mom in the background. She married Matt and I.

There is still a Wife, who no longer has her Husband. There are still a couple Kids, who no longer have their Dad. There is still a Brother, who no longer has his Brother. There is still a Grandchild, who no longer has a Grandpa. There are still Nieces and Nephews without their Uncle. And there are friends, who are now without a friend. Grief is grief. It looks different for everyone. There is no right or wrong way to grieve.  Now, there is a new handful of people walking in their own journey of grief. They all know they will see him again. And although that may bring some comfort in the early morning hours of not being able to sleep, it doesn’t change the fact that they must travel through this new journey of grief in their own way.

Bridesmaids Kris, Kimberly, and Miriam. Groomsmen Uncle Bill, Kent, and Ed.

When someone passes unexpectedly, it reminds us to never let an argument stand in your way of forgiveness. Don’t hold grudges. Let people know that you love them. We are only here for a short time. Let’s leave a good mark and enjoy our time. Life is short. It’s been fun reading different stories that people have been sharing of Uncle Bill. It’s very apparent that he was a wonderful man of God.

And, I’m sure Uncle Bill is having a great time getting acquainted to his new Heavenly Home. Walking the streets of Gold, being reunited with family and friends who have gone on before him. He is probably feeling indescribable JOY! You guys, he gets to meet Jesus! Face to face! That’s incredible!